I was walking down the street when I was accosted by a particularly dirty and shabby-looking homeless woman who asked me for a couple of dollars for dinner.
در حال قدم زدن در خیابان بودم که با خانمی نسبتا کثیف و کهنه پوشی که شبیه زنان بی خانه بود روبرو شدم که از من 2 دلار برای تهیه ناهار درخواست کرد.
I took out my wallet, got out ten dollars and asked, 'If I give you this money, will you buy wine with it instead of dinner?'
من کیف پولم را در آوردم و 10 دلار برداشتم و ازش پرسیدم اگر من این پول را بهت بدم تو مشروب بجای شام می خری؟!
'No, I had to stop drinking years ago' , the homeless woman told me.
The Elevator
An Amish boy and his father were in a mall. They were amazed by almost everything they saw, but especially by two shiny, silver walls that could move apart and then slide back together again.
The boy asked, "What is this, Father?" The father (never having seen an elevator) responded, "Son, I have never seen anything like this in my life, I don't know what it is."
While the boy and his father were watching with amazement, a fat, ugly old lady moved up to the moving walls and pressed a button. The walls opened, and the lady walked between them into a small room.
The walls closed, and the boy and his father watched the small numbers above the walls light up sequentially.
They continued to watch until it reached the last number, and then the numbers began to light in the reverse order.
Finally the walls opened up again and a gorgeous 24-year-old blond stepped out.
The father, not taking his eyes off the young woman, said quietly to his son, "Go get your mother.
ترجمه در ادامه مطلب
ادامه مطلب ...
Two soldiers were in camp. The first one's name was George, and the second one's name was Bill. George said, 'Have you got a piece of paper and an envelope, Bill?'
Bill said, 'Yes, I have,' and he gave them to him.
Then George said, 'Now I haven't got a pen.' Bill gave him his, and George wrote his letter. Then he put it in the envelope and said, 'Have you got a stamp, Bill?' Bill gave him one.
Then Bill got up and went to the door, so George said to him, 'Areyou going out?
Bill said, 'Yes, I am,' and he opened the door.
George said, 'Please put my letter in the box in the office, and ... ' He stopped.
'What do you want now?' Bill said to him.
George looked at the envelope of his letter and answered, 'What's your girl-friend's address?'
ترجمه در ادامه مطلب
ادامه مطلب ...
The Loan
Two friends, Sam and Mike, were
riding on a bus. Suddenly the bus stopped and bandits got on.
The bandits began robbing the passengers. They were taking the
passengers’ jewelry and watches. They were taking all their money, too.
Sam opened his wallet and took out twenty dollars. He gave the twenty dollars
to Mike Why are you giving me this money?” Mike asked Last week I didn’t have
any money, and you loaned me twenty dollars, remember?” Sam said. “Yes, I
remember,” Mike said. " I’m paying you back,” Sam said
ترجمه در ادامه مطلب
ادامه مطلب ...
A little girl asked her father
"How did the human race appear?"
دختر کوچولویی از پدرش سوال کرد"چطور نژاد انسانها بوجود آمد؟"
The Father answered "God made Adam and Eve; they had children; and so all mankind was made"
پدر جواب داد"خدا آدم و حوا را خلق کرد, آنها بچه آوردند سپس همه نوع بشر بوجود آمدند"
Two days later the girl asked her mother the same question.
دو روز بعد دختره همون سوال را از مادرش پرسید .
The mother answered
"Many years ago there were monkeys from which the human race
evolved."
مادر جواب داد "سالها پیش میمونها وجود داشتنداز اونها هم نژاد انسانها بوجود اومد."
The confused girl went back to her father and said " Daddy, how is it possible that you told me human race was created God and Mommy said they developed from monkeys?"
دختر گیج شده به طرف پدرش برگشت و پرسید"پدر چطور این ممکنه که شما به من گفتین نژاد انسانها را خدا خلق کرده است و مامان گفت آنها تکامل یافته از میمونها هستند؟"
The father answered "Well, Dear, it is very simple. I told you about my side of the family and your mother told you about her."
پدر جواب داد " خوب عزیزم خیلی ساده است .من در مورد فامیلهای خودم گفته ام و مادرت در مورد فامیلهای خودش